OK, I have all sorts of theories, mad ones, bad ones, really really sad ones and ones that I reckon someone out there has to read because it will surely change the world...anyway I have so many that it's going to take a really long time to get them all down on this page but I'll give it a try, one small step, one idea, one day at a time...that's my Alternative Answer philosophy, that's what AA stands for isn't it?.

Here's a simple one to start us off.

It really doesn't matter what school your child goes to, as long as they're not being hurt in anyway, they all turn out the same in the end...just like you. DOH!....wisdom passed down from generations of older people who wish they'd known then what they know now. "Doh!" - That's just passed down from Homer Simpson, a true and underrated philosopher of our time.

Do you have an introverted or extroverted house?

I have a theory that houses that face front-out towards each other create or reinforce more sociable people which in turn create closer-knit communities, especially in the case of a cul-de-sac or quiet terraced road, where houses face each other (or not) across a non through-traffic road.

In our cul-de-sac, it does appear that according to other cul-de-sac members, the ones who appear most sociable are the ones whose houses face into the cul-de-sac, directly towards other houses, whereas, although not unfriendly, the side facing houses appear to have people in them who prefer more privacy or less social interaction.

Most people don’t get the chance to choose their house off-plan and can’t necessarily pick a house that faces outwards or otherwise when they purchase it, maybe there is a subconscious drive to look at a house in the first place that reflects our personalities, but on the surface at least, most people probably find that they moved to the house due to the location or for financial reasons, the aspect of the house might not have been at the forefront of their thoughts, which indicates that more often than not (and if subconscious decisions are put aside), the angle of the house changes YOUR outlook on life and less so the other way around, because if your personality fights with the house position and angle you are more likely to move.

It would be good to have a proper experiment where clearly outgoing sociable people moved into side facing houses and see if they become more withdrawn (at least in terms of their neighbours).

I notice that all my friends talk of great communities in roads that are in essence alike to a cul-de-sac, i.e. they don’t have passing traffic, the houses are closely packed or more likely to be terraced, so there is no gap to separate them (mentally as well as literally), only cars coming and going to the houses and that end in a dead-end or 90 degree angle road at the end.

Whereas people who live in busy passing traffic wider roads, often know only their immediate neighbours if that, or perhaps one or two more if they are by nature very sociable people.

The road does appear to be a barrier, it doesn’t reflect housing and it’s positive friendliness, it reflects moving objects, objects that are getting the hell outta here, that’s an unfriendly metaphor to start, whereas houses opposite houses reflect each other, echoing the same solid, safe, friendly feeling your house gives out. Perhaps like people, it’s akin to ‘mirroring’.

Successful socialisers and communicators mirror other people, using their words, body language and even clothing style, why shouldn’t a house do the same and produce the same friendly types. When they say in dreams that a house represents ‘the self’ you can see why from a psychological point of view, our house is akin to ourselves and reflects our personality, if not then perhaps that too would culminate in a reflection of our actions in the fact that we also ‘get outta here’ and move, we can’t stay still there, like the passing traffic. And if we have no similar reflection to look into and see another smiling person or similar house facing back, we simply don’t see friendliness, and we just keep ourselves to ourselves.

All this goes to say, if correct, that if you want to feel part of a community move to a cul-de-sac or a terraced no through-traffic road and if you want the quieter life or anticipate moving in the not too distant future, move to a wider thoroughfare or pick a side angled house in a cul-de-sac.

My experience or theory tells me a quiet life where you don’t have to move is more likely in a cul-de-sac than a thoroughfare, but served best of all in a house surrounded by no near buildings i.e. a house in the country, where you have no overbearing neighbours and no passing ‘let’s move’ traffic.

Equally a sociable person who buys a remote country house would find a way to encourage their friends to visit and stay for periods that made the house feel constantly used and busy (but that’s a whole other subject).

Also bear in mind, your own personality will to some degree override some of these effects as a very sociable person will always make that much more effort to cross a road than an introvert and an introvert that buys an extrovert house (so to speak) may feel put upon and/or could be seen as a bit of a grump by the other members of the close-knit community.